As humans we love to feel like we’re in control of our lives and our circumstances. We often fear the feeling of uncertainty and not being able to dictate how the journey will go or where we land up. Often this means expending enormous energy in order to have all our plans set out before us and wanting to know everything and every detail that lies ahead. We constantly want to know the ending before we have journeyed there, and we want to see the full picture of what our future looks like right now. What if this stops us from growing and maturing in our faith and trust in God?
Recently I had the awesome opportunity to hike up Table Mountain with some of my closest friends. We decided to do a route on the way up called Skeleton Gorge and then come back down a route named Nursery Ravine which both started and ended in Kirstenbosch Gardens. It was an absolutely exquisite walk that was enough to take anyone’s breath away (partly due to the intense gradient of the climb). It was a 17km hike (pretty much all a steep incline or decline the entire way) that took us just shy of 9 hours and we were absolutely fatigued by the end to say the least. Had I known how many steps I’d have to take to ascend and then painfully descend the majestic mountain I may have been met with much apprehension and even turned back before we had begun. Sometimes the beauty is that it’s just one step at a time, with a break every now and again to marvel at the incredible surroundings before taking the next step without knowing just how many steps need to be taken to complete the journey. How sad it would have been to miss out on the entire experience because I had foreknowledge of what the journey entailed and was too scared to take the first step. And how sad it would have been to not be present and feel each step that ultimately led to a satisfying achievement and epic experience.
I have just completed and handed in my thesis which is the last component of my master’s degree, and I don’t even know what to feel. Sure, it’s exciting but it’s been such a journey that relief is certainly a more apt description. Had I known what enormous commitment and hard work this degree would require before I set out on my studies I would have very likely backed out and chosen something else over the immense fear and magnitude of the task ahead and would have turned down what I believe to be my calling. But again, that’s the beauty, I didn’t know all that lay ahead and all that was required when I began and so all I could do was put one foot in from of the next and clear each hurdle as they came. And now I am here one step away from completing my masters and becoming a qualified Psychologist.
We don’t need to know the bigger picture sometimes or exactly how our life is going to plan out. Sometimes all we need is to take the first step and follow God with a childlike faith and dependence because His plans are bigger than our own and if we try tackle life in our own strength, we will fall short time and again. We need to allow Him to fill out the details of our life while we faithfully take a step at a time, while enjoying each segment of the mountain of life that we are climbing. I want to surrender to Him because I realise just how little I can do in my own strength and understanding. The more we surrender ourselves to the Lord the more clearly we are able to see His hand at work in our lives. A quote from one of my favourite Switchfoot songs, The Strength to Let Go, beautifully encapsulates the overall message I am wanting to convey, “Oh Love, light the way home, light up my soul, I choose mercy instead of control.”
Psalm 37:7 – “Surrender yourself to the Lord, and wait patiently for Him”.
Live it well 